A few days after my blog entry about my impatience, I had the opportunity to experience some releases regarding the information that was stored inside my body that created the pressure. I knew my impatience was not mine and was not serving me, I was just waiting for something, a situation, an image, a person, to trigger the release.
Paul, Olivier and I went away for a few days to visit family members and on our way there, we stop at a restaurant. As we are eating, my son is not wanting to sit down to eat and all he wants to do is run around the restaurant, ask about everything he sees and play “pick a boo”. On my husband's hollodeck, this was amusing and he was just so delighted to be able to spend some time with him. On my hollodeck, the pressure in my body was high. So, I decided to just sit back and started to breath. The information moved up in my throat and it was hard for me to sallow and to breath well so I got up. I felt like things were heavy around me and as I recall the moment, the image in my mind is grayish in color and fuzzy. I walked around for a bite (just like my son) and I felt a little better.
As we are about to leave, I go to the washroom with my son to wash his hands and as I enter the washroom, it hit me. A wave of fear, then sadness came over my body. It was very powerful. My cells were remembering something about the past, probably related to an event that happened in a public washroom. I re-lived it, and then a sense of peace came over my body.
As we continued our drive, I allowed to wave to continue it's work, with no story attached to it. Knowing and believing that the impatience did not belong to me, it was just a matter of voicing my concern about the impatience I was feeling, claiming it and then sending my intentions to release it. The difference has been night and day. Even my friends ask me, " don't you get annoyed at all the questions he asks" It's not even relevant anymore. I feel a tremendous amount of space around my relationship with him. I feel so fortunate to have him as a little teacher. I am looking forward to what will come about, what will be created in the new space we opened up for ourselves.
Children are little Sun's walking around, shinning their brilliance beautifully, gracefully and so clearly. They are our most precious teachers as they shine the light of love directly from the source. They need our guidance with earthly ways and we need their guidance with the ways of love.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
This is a story
I feel the pain in my lower back and when I take deep breaths, it is restricted around my right shoulder, my chest and the right side of my neck. Along with that is a feeling of impatience with myself and therefore, with my son.
The more I spend time with him, the more I learn about him and myself. But lately, I have been feeling overwhelmed with the amount of questions he asks and I have had a hard time staying centered and resourceful. I sit on the floor and I look at him and answer his questions and I try to breath and calm myself but inside, I feel the pressure rising and rising. I am unwilling to give up and turn on the tv or feed him a cookie but it gets to a point where I starts crying and my husband had to come and help me out and give me a time out. when I cry in front of my son, he cries too.
I am my worst enemy on this one, I know. But this ugly secret, that I don't have content or words for right now, makes me powerless and I cant stay resourceful.
It probably has something to do with how I was curious and hungry for life when I was young and I wasn't able to show or speak the immense joy I felt towards life, in order for me to be accepted and loved. But knowing that, and breathing and meditating, it's still there... A little bit more patience with myself would probably help.
Breath...
The more I spend time with him, the more I learn about him and myself. But lately, I have been feeling overwhelmed with the amount of questions he asks and I have had a hard time staying centered and resourceful. I sit on the floor and I look at him and answer his questions and I try to breath and calm myself but inside, I feel the pressure rising and rising. I am unwilling to give up and turn on the tv or feed him a cookie but it gets to a point where I starts crying and my husband had to come and help me out and give me a time out. when I cry in front of my son, he cries too.
I am my worst enemy on this one, I know. But this ugly secret, that I don't have content or words for right now, makes me powerless and I cant stay resourceful.
It probably has something to do with how I was curious and hungry for life when I was young and I wasn't able to show or speak the immense joy I felt towards life, in order for me to be accepted and loved. But knowing that, and breathing and meditating, it's still there... A little bit more patience with myself would probably help.
Breath...
Monday, July 16, 2007
ReDefining Education
RETREAT and WORKSHOP
RETREAT and WORKSHOP
When children are allowed and invited to explore openly the magnitude of their true self, opportunities for self-created learning will present themselves naturally. When parents tap into their own brilliance, creating an environment favorable for children to initiate their growth from their own natural rhythm and flow, authentic motivations and inspirations spark. As human beings, we are curious in nature and the desire to grow and learn is innate in all of us. When initiated and engaged by the children, learning happens at quantum speed, and joy and meaning are constants in the process.
This retreat and workshop is an invitation for parents and children interested in exploring how they can redefine education for themselves by connecting with their true self and inner creativity. Through the power of the arts and the elements in nature, along with ancient wisdom and cutting edge science, you will be invited to discover resourceful, exciting, and life changing ways to inspire, learn, and connect with each other.
This retreat and workshop is an invitation for parents and children interested in exploring how they can redefine education for themselves by connecting with their true self and inner creativity. Through the power of the arts and the elements in nature, along with ancient wisdom and cutting edge science, you will be invited to discover resourceful, exciting, and life changing ways to inspire, learn, and connect with each other.
Parents, you will be invited to:
-see your own brilliance, follow your inner guidance, and find how you can engage from that place of wisdom and love with your children
-consider moving from being externally referenced to internally referenced
-let go of old patterns and habits that are no longer serving you in interacting with your children and create new patterns that promote natural learning and wellbeing
-find ways to remain resourceful in daily situations
- discover how to create huge amount of space for life and learning to unfold.
-consider moving from being externally referenced to internally referenced
-let go of old patterns and habits that are no longer serving you in interacting with your children and create new patterns that promote natural learning and wellbeing
-find ways to remain resourceful in daily situations
- discover how to create huge amount of space for life and learning to unfold.
Children, you will be invited to:
-be 100% yourself and find out how resourceful and magnificent your are
-discover how to know and trust your true self and follow your intuition
-learn, through your experience of the elements in nature and through art, how we are all connected and all unique.
-find ways to express what you have to say, create what you desire and discover your own unique talents.
-have fun with all aspect of learning.
-discover how to know and trust your true self and follow your intuition
-learn, through your experience of the elements in nature and through art, how we are all connected and all unique.
-find ways to express what you have to say, create what you desire and discover your own unique talents.
-have fun with all aspect of learning.
Dates: September 14-16 2007
Location: to be held at beautiful seaside
Oceanstone Inn and Cottages oceanstone.ns.ca
8898 Peggy’s Cove road, Indian Harbour, NS
Investment
$789 per parent/child couple + hst
Includes two nights stay at Oceanstone, all meals from Friday dinner to Sunday lunch, facilitation, and workshop.
Your facilitators
Céline Burlock-Levasseur BEd
Céline is a mother, a certified WEL-Systems Catalyst(TM), a published writer in the field of personal development, parenting and education. She is a certified teacher in Nova Scotia with 14 years of experience.
Anne Thibeault-Bérubé, BEd, MA, PhD
Anne is a mother, a certified WEL-Systems Facilitator(TM), a published writer and a public speaker in the field of Comparative French Literature. She has many years of experience teaching children and adults in FSL at all levels.
Come experience the immensity of who you are in this natural and beautiful wide-open space of growth and love, and redefine education. To register or for more information, contact Anne at 902-449-7856 or anne@oceanstone.ns.ca
Anne Thibeault-Bérubé, BEd, MA, PhD
Anne is a mother, a certified WEL-Systems Facilitator(TM), a published writer and a public speaker in the field of Comparative French Literature. She has many years of experience teaching children and adults in FSL at all levels.
Come experience the immensity of who you are in this natural and beautiful wide-open space of growth and love, and redefine education. To register or for more information, contact Anne at 902-449-7856 or anne@oceanstone.ns.ca
Friday, July 13, 2007
No story
I am going to Kauai in a few weeks to see Laura and receive a two week personal HUNA intensive. This all came about when I decided not to take the job at Acadia and when my class got cancelled. It just happenned, it felt like there was no options, this is what I am suppose to do now, regardless. I don't know what is in store for me there and after but it feels immense. Since my decision to go, my body has been going through this cleansing and I found myself getting physically stronger. In yoga, which I just started last month, and had never done it before, I can do these really intense poses. I feel like I am regaining my childhood flexibility.
A few days ago, I received a Reiki treatment from my friend Rachel and I combined my intentions with hers and the amount of release that happened within both of us was huge. After the treatment, I was looking at her talk and I could see her throat chackra very clearly. It was vibrating with her words.
I just watched the movie The Last Mimzy. It made me cry to see the little girl so strong and confident in who she was and what she had to do. I believe children know what is best for them, for us and for the world.
Some would say my son is going through his terrible twos but all he is doing is becoming aware of the limitations that I, and this world, have and are putting on to him. All he wants to do is live, be a creative being at every breath he takes. And he has what it takes to live like that, I am the one stopping him, with the way things should be.
How far can I go? How much can I let go of culturally conditioned belief? And at what pace? I feel everytime I take a big leap and shed beliefs, everything accelerates. It feels right now faster than I have ever felt, yet, I know that next week, I will feel like it is more than now.
If you are reading this and you don't know about Fire the grid, have a look at this website.
firethegrid.com
Please take some time on Tuesday to share your love with mother earth.
I think this is going to be another quantum leap for the universe and things will only get clearer and faster after.
This is my declaration of this moment.
“I am love and I will make no excuse for it and will be, more than ever, an expression of it at every breath.”
And let the pace pick up some more and let the ride continue…
A few days ago, I received a Reiki treatment from my friend Rachel and I combined my intentions with hers and the amount of release that happened within both of us was huge. After the treatment, I was looking at her talk and I could see her throat chackra very clearly. It was vibrating with her words.
I just watched the movie The Last Mimzy. It made me cry to see the little girl so strong and confident in who she was and what she had to do. I believe children know what is best for them, for us and for the world.
Some would say my son is going through his terrible twos but all he is doing is becoming aware of the limitations that I, and this world, have and are putting on to him. All he wants to do is live, be a creative being at every breath he takes. And he has what it takes to live like that, I am the one stopping him, with the way things should be.
How far can I go? How much can I let go of culturally conditioned belief? And at what pace? I feel everytime I take a big leap and shed beliefs, everything accelerates. It feels right now faster than I have ever felt, yet, I know that next week, I will feel like it is more than now.
If you are reading this and you don't know about Fire the grid, have a look at this website.
firethegrid.com
Please take some time on Tuesday to share your love with mother earth.
I think this is going to be another quantum leap for the universe and things will only get clearer and faster after.
This is my declaration of this moment.
“I am love and I will make no excuse for it and will be, more than ever, an expression of it at every breath.”
And let the pace pick up some more and let the ride continue…
Saturday, July 7, 2007
A lovely way
I am “Feeling” more than usual today. With deep, deep breaths, I feel emotions and sensations all over the tissue of my body. I feel everything raw. I just let it happen, I let it all flow all the way down to my core. I don't try to find what it means or what it will bring because it will come, in due time.
I feel different than yesterday, I feel more and more clear about what I want to do. I am letting go of the past, of old goals and aspirations that no longer fit my beliefs and values. I am remembering the original goal, the primary mission.
I was supposed to teach an intensive French class this summer at Acadia University. I was looking forward to the financial benefit of it but at the same time, I felt that it would be a few wasted weeks, now that I am speeding up on my own unique path. I knew I would have been able to be myself in the classroom but I would have been easily persuaded by my olds habits to use my mind more than my heart. I was supposed to start at the end of August and yesterday, they called me to tell me that the class was cancelled, that not enough people had registered. It's funny because a week before, they ask me if I wanted to teach a second intensive this summer because they were missing a teacher. After a hard time making up my mind, I decided that if the reason I would be taking the job was just for the money, then I shouldn’t, even if my mind was saying "are you crazy" So now, instead of two contracts this summer, I have zero... and all that time. Look at how I created this reality for myself.
I started doing some breathing and meditation. It felt to me that I would not be able to compress space and time and manifest what I wanted if I followed an external structure and timeline, like the one the university would provide.
At this moment, I feel like I am on a good path. I feel lost at times but I trust that state of being because it has proven me that something wonderful and meaningful is on the other side.
I feel a great sense of hope and love for my and all of humanity's future as I watch the LIVE Earth concert. I notice that artists who are engaged in there signing are moving people, and that when you can see the passion for what they are saying and signing, it's contagious. It makes me want to be impeccable with my words and always speak from a place of Love and Self.
Watching the concert in different cities all around the world, I know that we are all connected, that we are all the same and speaking the same language. I can see the world I envision and dream of forming little by little, but faster and faster and I am so grateful and excited to be part of this incredible ride. I know that we need to come together but before, it’s necessary to look inside and find ourselves. We need to share our unique gifts and talents, speak our truth, and then we can see how we are the same. We all come from the same source, from an intention of deep love.
Human beings have an immense and endless capacity to love. I truly believe that and I see it everywhere, more and more, in people’s eyes.
I feel the earth
I feel the hurt
but most of all
I fell you
The intensity of your love
your desire for connection
I see your light
I see you bright
I want to return to basics. There is so many things I have that I don’t need, things that sustain the illusion. Not just physical things but thoughts, beliefs, filters, opinions, judgment…
I want to feel more.
I want to feel. Feel, feel, feel… NOW!
Breath…
I feel different than yesterday, I feel more and more clear about what I want to do. I am letting go of the past, of old goals and aspirations that no longer fit my beliefs and values. I am remembering the original goal, the primary mission.
I was supposed to teach an intensive French class this summer at Acadia University. I was looking forward to the financial benefit of it but at the same time, I felt that it would be a few wasted weeks, now that I am speeding up on my own unique path. I knew I would have been able to be myself in the classroom but I would have been easily persuaded by my olds habits to use my mind more than my heart. I was supposed to start at the end of August and yesterday, they called me to tell me that the class was cancelled, that not enough people had registered. It's funny because a week before, they ask me if I wanted to teach a second intensive this summer because they were missing a teacher. After a hard time making up my mind, I decided that if the reason I would be taking the job was just for the money, then I shouldn’t, even if my mind was saying "are you crazy" So now, instead of two contracts this summer, I have zero... and all that time. Look at how I created this reality for myself.
I started doing some breathing and meditation. It felt to me that I would not be able to compress space and time and manifest what I wanted if I followed an external structure and timeline, like the one the university would provide.
At this moment, I feel like I am on a good path. I feel lost at times but I trust that state of being because it has proven me that something wonderful and meaningful is on the other side.
I feel a great sense of hope and love for my and all of humanity's future as I watch the LIVE Earth concert. I notice that artists who are engaged in there signing are moving people, and that when you can see the passion for what they are saying and signing, it's contagious. It makes me want to be impeccable with my words and always speak from a place of Love and Self.
Watching the concert in different cities all around the world, I know that we are all connected, that we are all the same and speaking the same language. I can see the world I envision and dream of forming little by little, but faster and faster and I am so grateful and excited to be part of this incredible ride. I know that we need to come together but before, it’s necessary to look inside and find ourselves. We need to share our unique gifts and talents, speak our truth, and then we can see how we are the same. We all come from the same source, from an intention of deep love.
Human beings have an immense and endless capacity to love. I truly believe that and I see it everywhere, more and more, in people’s eyes.
I feel the earth
I feel the hurt
but most of all
I fell you
The intensity of your love
your desire for connection
I see your light
I see you bright
I want to return to basics. There is so many things I have that I don’t need, things that sustain the illusion. Not just physical things but thoughts, beliefs, filters, opinions, judgment…
I want to feel more.
I want to feel. Feel, feel, feel… NOW!
Breath…
Monday, July 2, 2007
Fabulous thoughts, measured life
Here is one more thing. At this moment it feels like it’s ok for me to live my life authentically, as long as the person that will have to deal with my mistakes is only me. That would imply that I will make mistakes. Maybe I should think of them not so much as mistakes but as explorations. But what if my choices of taking the road less traveled and engaging with my son in new, unproven ways proved to be detrimental to him? I mean, for example when it comes to food, how far can I go in trusting our natural rhythms without affecting his health?
That is a big question of trust and I am glad I am visiting this question at this point in my life. I feel that in order for me to live truly authentically, I have to be extreme in other people’s eyes. I was taught to stay in the middle, to not be extreme in anything. Extreme was dangerous because I might end up not fitting in, or alone.
To live My life, I need to live at the extreme end of my beliefs. If I desire a fabulous life and have extravagant thoughts, I can’t start measuring my thoughts, my words, my feelings. I am extravagant, I am the sun. I am not measured and reasonable.
That is a big question of trust and I am glad I am visiting this question at this point in my life. I feel that in order for me to live truly authentically, I have to be extreme in other people’s eyes. I was taught to stay in the middle, to not be extreme in anything. Extreme was dangerous because I might end up not fitting in, or alone.
To live My life, I need to live at the extreme end of my beliefs. If I desire a fabulous life and have extravagant thoughts, I can’t start measuring my thoughts, my words, my feelings. I am extravagant, I am the sun. I am not measured and reasonable.
Little mirrors
I wonder to what extent my son is a reflection of me.
I have been spending most of my time with my 2 year old son. I have been busy writing my thesis these past months that I just recently notice how much he had changed and I felt like I had missed out on his growth. Not that I need to be there for every moment, but I did create him and I feel like he can teach me a lot.. about myself. And he is such a joy to be with.
So I stayed at home with him for the last 7 days. I knew I needed to change my priorities and the way I go about my day. I wanted to see what would happened if I just followed his rhythm, do everything he wanted to do, inspire him to discover new things and just 'be' with him. When I follow his rhythm, I came to realize that there is nothing to fight against. And not just that, but I discovered new things. We went for a walk in the forest and I let him lead the way. Immediately, he chose to go off the path, into the rough, and we discovered enchanting new water streams and big mossy boulders that I didn't know were there. We laid on the grass, look at the sky, played with a few bugs... it really was much more pleasant than our usual walks on the 'path'.
Because I had made the decision to 'be' with him, I think he knew that I didn't have anything urgent to do so he would not want to leave the beach or the forest until he was completely done. Often, I would get the feeling that I wasn't very productive and that I should be working on more important things. Even if I had made the conscious decision to be with him for the week, old habits were knocking on my door for the entire week. Sometimes, it would be so great that I would break down and cry. I felt like I was wasting time and that is unacceptable in my old model of the world. When I would try to skip out to my computer to read or write, I felt like he knew if I was doing it to escape something or if it truly was important. It drove me crazy some times because he would not give me a break from just “being’’. I wonder how much we put our children in daycares and schools just because we can’t handle the reflection of our own selves.
I started to wonder to what extent my son’s own rhythm is a mirror for my own? If the source is more evolved and he is still so young with very little cultural conditioning, he must be wiser than I can imagine. He would only know the natural rhythm of life because he lives completely in his body. I wonder to what extent I could still be productive, healthy, happy, and do the work I want to do, if I had him all the time with me?
The thought seems crazy to me right now but I can sense a certain wisdom in it. I will continue to explore that.
The past week, I have found myself in interesting social situations. As I live my truth in my daily life, I found myself talking to more people and creating situations (out of my awareness) that help me discover more about the work I want to do with children and parents. At first, when I realized that the people I was interacting with were not familiar at all with my views of education, I started to doubt the value of what I want to bring to the world. After a few waves, I came to realize that I have to be in situation where people are not familiar or how am I suppose to make a difference? For so long, I have been seeking people that think like me,... well, except for a very few people and a few books, I wasn't being truly myself when I was in conversations with most people I met. Like Louise says in her blog, it's easy to preach to the converted.
This is a whole new way of going through the world for me. And I need to breath....
I helped out a friend on Friday evening, bartending for an event, and I forgot to breath for 5 hours. Wow, do I ever regret that. I felt hung-over (I didn't drink) the day after, I just wanted to sleep and there was my son, wanting a new adventure... I thought I was going to die. I don't know yet what kind of lesson that was but maybe something about how should not engage in activities where I will find it to hard to be my authentic self.
Something else came up this past week with my son. The whole issue around food and meals. The three meals a day, whoever invented that? I feel like trying to feed a child at specific times and specific foods that we think are good for them, is creating some sort of addiction. I notice that my son is very happy drinking juice, milk and water all day with fruits and a few veggies. I wonder how much creating pressure around eating at that young age creates addiction to food later?
And as we evolve, and our vibrations become higher, how much food do we really need? Is it even a need?
I have been spending most of my time with my 2 year old son. I have been busy writing my thesis these past months that I just recently notice how much he had changed and I felt like I had missed out on his growth. Not that I need to be there for every moment, but I did create him and I feel like he can teach me a lot.. about myself. And he is such a joy to be with.
So I stayed at home with him for the last 7 days. I knew I needed to change my priorities and the way I go about my day. I wanted to see what would happened if I just followed his rhythm, do everything he wanted to do, inspire him to discover new things and just 'be' with him. When I follow his rhythm, I came to realize that there is nothing to fight against. And not just that, but I discovered new things. We went for a walk in the forest and I let him lead the way. Immediately, he chose to go off the path, into the rough, and we discovered enchanting new water streams and big mossy boulders that I didn't know were there. We laid on the grass, look at the sky, played with a few bugs... it really was much more pleasant than our usual walks on the 'path'.
Because I had made the decision to 'be' with him, I think he knew that I didn't have anything urgent to do so he would not want to leave the beach or the forest until he was completely done. Often, I would get the feeling that I wasn't very productive and that I should be working on more important things. Even if I had made the conscious decision to be with him for the week, old habits were knocking on my door for the entire week. Sometimes, it would be so great that I would break down and cry. I felt like I was wasting time and that is unacceptable in my old model of the world. When I would try to skip out to my computer to read or write, I felt like he knew if I was doing it to escape something or if it truly was important. It drove me crazy some times because he would not give me a break from just “being’’. I wonder how much we put our children in daycares and schools just because we can’t handle the reflection of our own selves.
I started to wonder to what extent my son’s own rhythm is a mirror for my own? If the source is more evolved and he is still so young with very little cultural conditioning, he must be wiser than I can imagine. He would only know the natural rhythm of life because he lives completely in his body. I wonder to what extent I could still be productive, healthy, happy, and do the work I want to do, if I had him all the time with me?
The thought seems crazy to me right now but I can sense a certain wisdom in it. I will continue to explore that.
The past week, I have found myself in interesting social situations. As I live my truth in my daily life, I found myself talking to more people and creating situations (out of my awareness) that help me discover more about the work I want to do with children and parents. At first, when I realized that the people I was interacting with were not familiar at all with my views of education, I started to doubt the value of what I want to bring to the world. After a few waves, I came to realize that I have to be in situation where people are not familiar or how am I suppose to make a difference? For so long, I have been seeking people that think like me,... well, except for a very few people and a few books, I wasn't being truly myself when I was in conversations with most people I met. Like Louise says in her blog, it's easy to preach to the converted.
This is a whole new way of going through the world for me. And I need to breath....
I helped out a friend on Friday evening, bartending for an event, and I forgot to breath for 5 hours. Wow, do I ever regret that. I felt hung-over (I didn't drink) the day after, I just wanted to sleep and there was my son, wanting a new adventure... I thought I was going to die. I don't know yet what kind of lesson that was but maybe something about how should not engage in activities where I will find it to hard to be my authentic self.
Something else came up this past week with my son. The whole issue around food and meals. The three meals a day, whoever invented that? I feel like trying to feed a child at specific times and specific foods that we think are good for them, is creating some sort of addiction. I notice that my son is very happy drinking juice, milk and water all day with fruits and a few veggies. I wonder how much creating pressure around eating at that young age creates addiction to food later?
And as we evolve, and our vibrations become higher, how much food do we really need? Is it even a need?
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